“Human Superglue” Can't Take a Hint

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

“Human Superglue” 

The most awkward and uncomfortable social interaction ever. 

By Sarah Lee
November 17, 2015

Human Glue, but not the good kind. The bad kind, like superglue that sticks your fingers together and just won’t go away until you forcefully pry away or patiently wait until it wears off…hours or days later.




(Note: Hamina is too nice so I'm writing this one.) 

We love having a great friend is always there for us.

But some of us know that one person who just won’t leave us alone.

Important Key Difference: It’s not that this person doesn’t have friends, or is socially awkward (albeit he or she might be socially unaware,) but for whatever reason this person sticks to you like glue.

They can't take a hint - but they also take it to a whole new level. 

You might not even notice the person you are with plans on clinging to you like super glue, until you casually say…

“Okay, it was really awesome hanging out with you but now I really need to go take care of something.”

Then you realize you. can’t. get. rid. of. him…or in my case her.

The best example of socially unaware super glue is *Laura.

When I first met her, I thought she was a sweet little shy transfer student who just wanted to make friends. So one day, I thought I should introduce her to Hamina and her hermanito. 

Everything was fine, but time passed and Hamina, her bro, and I had plans to eat at a Chinese food place about 35 minutes away.

We begin to signal.

“Hey, it was great talking but we need to go. We have other plans, but I’ll see you tomorrow” Cue #1 – exit right.


“Where are you going?” She asks. 
A sinking feeling enters my stomach. I can feel it coming.

“I promised to take Sarah and my brother out to try this Chinese food place to pay her back for lunch the other day” Hamina says with her signature poker face. 

Cue #2 Hamina is paying for me and her brother. Private. 

We drop cues blitzkrieg style. Still, nothing. 

“Cool, I could use some Chinese food.” Laura says. And we have all been super glued. 

And so it begins.

At the restaurant, she drinks from Hamina’s little brother’s cup of juice because she wanted to try it not realizing he’s HATES to drink from the same cup as others because he finds it unsanitary.

She has no money, and so Hamina pays for her food.


We later find out Laura’s boyfriend is a drug dealer and she is an addict. I notice she begins to open a class vial of what looks like the liquid inside of a Hookah pen. She begins to sniff (or snort) it – the car jerks – and she spills it on her backpack. She then begins to hunch over and lick the liquid from her bag.

This is not good because Hamina’s parents would kill her if her car smelled like drugs – even legal ones.

P.S. And this is just one example.


Once, I told her I was going to my room to sleep because I have a shift at work right after that lasts until midnight. But because she wants to wait to avoid rush hour, she asks me if she can hang out in my room. While. I. Am. Sleeping. 

You can mess with my money, you can mess with me, but when you mess with my sleep you have crossed a line. 

*Laura is a pseudonym 

2 comments :

  1. Such a great and interesting post! :)

    Would you like to follow each other via GFC, Bloglovin, Facebook or Instagram? I'd be super happy! Just tell me and I'll follow back immediately. :)

    XX,
    Sara

    www.saritschka.com

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  2. I love this post :D

    If you want us to follow each other, let me know on my blog
    xoxo

    http://badassvampire.blogspot.rs/

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